Returning home

I think I just figured out why I always preferred writing pen to paper rather than fingers to keyboard. I just typed out part of a really cool post and I went to select and copy so that I didn't lose it and my wrist hit a button on the keyboard and goodbye!

BLANK SCREEN!

Arrgghh. I'll try and recreate it now that I've vented!

A beautiful synchronicity occurred this past Saturday with all this talk of going to Europe. I turned on 880 The Revolution (Asheville's Progressive Talk Radio) and Virato Live! had a lady on there talking about indigenous people. They brought up the fact that all of us are descended from indigenous people. Now it seems like a no-brainer but I have always considered myself a "white American" with no real ties to anything indigenous. I mean, sure I figured someone came over on a boat from Europe but other than that I've never given it much thought.

Being adopted has really hindered my ability to discover much of anything about my blood relatives. Even after my birth mother and I were finally reunited, I learned that she was also adopted. Chances are slim that I will ever find anything out about my blood ancestors and that fact breaks my heart, not only for myself but also for my children. Some people believe that whatever is in your DNA doesn't matter but I passionately disagree.

I have spent a lot of time on the family trees of my adoptive family and my husband's family as well. I found it fascinating to learn about the people who came before us, what they did and even what their names were. Working on a family tree helps you learn so much beyond the names of the parents and grandparents that came before you.

Anyhow, Naomi Archer was saying that we are now being called back to the places we came from, usually Europe. Listened to the show on my computer and tried to quote as closely as possible:

we've lost our sense of place and our sense of connection with place...the idea
of place-based knowledge. The spiritual knowledge and cultural
knowledge is always in the ground, it's always in the air, it's in the
earth and it never dies...No matter where we're at, not matter how long we've
been there we have a homeland and that homeland is Europe...This is the time
when people of European heritage will be called back to the ways of their
ancestors...Because (the knowledge) is still there we have an opportunity to
help regain the significant cultural knowledge that our ancestors held.
It's up to us to take it forward particularly as we face catastrophic climate
change. We're going to need that sacred knowledge to help us get through
that time.

40,000 years my ancestors spent in Europe, the Iladurarrak (Sacred Moon People). I wonder if this has any connection to my lifelong interest in paganism and fascination with ancient rituals comes from. I am most certainly being called back, now I have to decide how to handle it.
www.intuitivepath.org is the website to learn more about them.

Get me outta here

After an exhausting debate with my husband about politics, I can't help but find my mind drifting to my dreams of becoming an American Expatriate. He was the one who put the bug in my ear about it. I can't help but think I'd love to try living in Europe. Since I work at Starbucks, I checked to see where in Europe there are many Starbucks locations. France, Germany, Greece, Spain, Ireland and the UK. Well, I don't want to go to France because I've always heard that people are rude. I don't want to go to Germany because apparently it is illegal to homeschool your children there. It would be neat to live somewhere they don't speak English so I settled on Greece and Spain. I actually speak some Spanish which might make Spain more reasonable but I think Greece is absolutely more romantic.

Maybe it is because I am Pagan and all those Greek myths we learned in school really resonate with me but I can't think of anything more amazing than walking the same earth as the people who were telling those stories. I recently saw a Samantha Brown Show on the travel channel about Myknonos, Greece and just loved it.

Anyhow, I've been trying to find some blogs to read from American Expatriates but not having much luck. First hand accounts of living abroad would help me so much. Particularly if they were from someone in less than affluent circumstances.

Treasure Map Complete!

I have A LOT to do this year!!

Treasure Map In Progress

I don't really have time to be on here right now, my Treasure map needs to be done by 12:49 tomorrow but I felt amiss not updating. Treasure mapping has been unexpectedly emotionally draining, but I hope that is a good sign because it means I've really been putting myself into it.

There is a lot of stuff about publishing a book and travelling Europe on there. I have some descrepancies on the Feng Shui Bagua, my book says travel goes in the bottom right and what the woman posted on Mothering.com said to put it in the bottom left. I just decided to make the whole bottom of the poster a "cityscape" so to speak of European Cities.

When I got started Tuesday I lit candles and inscense and cleansed the living room and dining room where I was working. I asked the God and Goddess to help me work from the heart. It is really hard to quiet my inner critic about how it looks but I guess that is just practice for the year to come. I have to keep my ego out of things so that I can manifest what I want in my life.

More later...

I don't wanna

Okay, so Friday mid-day my husband announces he is quitting smoking. The two of us have gone back and forth about this for years. I felt I needed a little preparation, but you see, we smoke American Spirit Organic Blend Rolling Tobacco, and I'm incapabale of rolling a cigarette so I depend on him for my supply. We don't smoke much, I never have more than 3-6 a day. The thought had already crossed my mind that I needed to quit before the Treasure Map, or somehow put it on my Treasure Map that I don't want to smoke any more. Except you're not supposed to put on there what you DON'T want and I'm not sure how to put "not smoking" into the posititve.

Decluttering Myself: Extreme makeover

I had my hair lopped off yesterday and the experience was thrilling! As anyone with curly hair can testify, getting my hair cut is usually a nerve-wracking and frustrating experience. This time I was truly ready and I found the right stylist.

Her name is Carrie at Clay Spa and Salon in Weaverville. She immediately put me at ease. "I love change so I am really excited about this," she said. She had an interesting techinique for cutting curly hair and I was thrilled with the results. The cut was honestly the best I've ever had in my life.

As I started thinking about decluttering the energy issues I realized that my long hair had been with me for at least 5 years and I have been through some tough times since then. I was keeping all that negative energy around me in my hair. It was time to clear the slate and say goodbye to the things that have been holding me back in life. A metaphor, maybe, but I still think it will have a profound effect on me.

In fact, just in the past day and a half since I've had it done, I feel that people are more responsive to me. It is as though I was invisible before and now people can see me.

Decluttering: Part One

In the process of decluttering I went to a local used bookstore and turned in a box of books. Books are the most difficult thing for me to get let go. I used the store credit they gave me to buy Clear Your Clutter with Feng Shui by Karen Kingston. She has this to say about books:

Holding on to old books is a very common problem, especially for people with enquiring minds. To many, books are like faithful companions. They are always there to keep you company when you need them...But the problem with holding on to old books is that it doesn't allow you to create space for new ideas and ways of thinking to come into your life. Your books symbolically represent your ideas and beliefs, and when you have too many of them sitting on bookshelves in your home, you become set in your ways and develop fusty energy like the fusty old books you surround yourself with.

I broke down the Feng Shui baguas in my apartment. According to the book, each area of your home represents an area of your life.

123
456
789

1-abundance
2-fame/reputation
3-relationship
4-family
5-health
6-creativity
7-self knowledge (and travel)
8-work
9-helpful people and angels.

Most of my "fusty" old books are in the creativity bagua and it is certainly true that I've been feeling stagnated creatively for quite some time. I have also found that the more I clean and declutter, the more I find myself wanting to write.

I just wish I had an unlimited amount of time to work on it sometimes. But I'm working hard to be happy with every little bit that does get done.

I was just talking to a friend of mine about moving. I know I don't want to move all this junk again. She suggested I move into their house when they move out, an idea I've given a lot of thought to in the past few months. Only thing is, that house doesn't have any closets! Arrgh! She says it has done wonders for them as far as eliminating clutter. I ask myself, am I really ready? We'll see how I feel when I get started on my Treasure Map 4/17.